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Elliot Page is opening up about what prompted him to announce last December that he is transgender and how he felt before and after his big announcement. In his first interview since coming
out as trans, for a cover story with _Time_ magazine, Page is emotional at times, and when asked how he felt before sharing the news, he pauses and puts his hand to his heart and closes his
eyes. “This feeling of true excitement and deep gratitude to have made it to this point in my life,” he says, “mixed with a lot of fear and anxiety.” Page adds that he expected the news to
be met with both praise and backlash but didn’t anticipate his announcement to get so much attention. “What I was anticipating was a lot of support and love and a massive amount of hatred
and transphobia,” he tells _Time_. “That’s essentially what happened.” He explains that it was partly the isolation caused by the ongoing coronavirus pandemic that led to him confronting
issues that he’d been wrestling with. “I had a lot of time on my own to really focus on things that I think, in so many ways, unconsciously, I was avoiding,” Page, who recently split from
his wife, Emma Portner, says. According to _Time_, Page was inspired by openly trans stars like Janet Mock and Laverne Cox, and reading the work of trans writers helped him better understand
his feelings. After “shame and discomfort,” Page recalls to _Time_, “I was finally able to embrace being transgender and letting myself fully become who I am.” And he feels a responsibility
to speak out. “Extremely influential people are spreading these myths and damaging rhetoric — every day you’re seeing our existence debated,” Page says. “Transgender people are so very
real.” In the profile, Page and close friend and fellow actor Alia Shawkat open up about the discomfort he felt earlier in his career after becoming famous for his acclaimed, Oscar-nominated
role in _Juno_. “He had a really hard time with the press and expectations,” Shawkat tells _Time_. “‘Put this on! And look this way! And this is sexy!’” Amid all of the primping and red
carpets and photoshoots, Page says, “I just never recognized myself. For a long time I could not even look at a photo of myself.” He says it was also difficult for him to watch himself in
movies, particularly ones in which he played more feminine roles, and by the time he appeared in movies like_ X-Men: The Last Stand_ and _Inception_, he was suffering from depression,
anxiety and panic attacks. Shawkat recalls that even putting on a T-shirt cut for a woman made him feel “unwell” and as if he were wearing a “costume.” Even after coming out as gay in 2014,
Page said he still felt a “discomfort” in his body. After coming out as trans, Page’s manager was contacted by casting directors who said it would be an honor to cast him, and his team is
receiving offers to direct, produce and act in trans-related projects. The actor is currently filming the third season of Netflix’s _The Umbrella Academy_, where his co-workers indicate he
seems more at peace. “It seems like there’s a tremendous weight off his shoulders, a feeling of comfort,” showrunner Steve Blackman tells _Time_. “There’s a lightness, a lot more smiling.”
And he’s looking forward to his future as an actor. “I’m really excited to act, now that I’m fully who I am, in this body,” Page says. “No matter the challenges and difficult moments of
this, nothing amounts to getting to feel how I feel now.” RELATED STORIES